I want a diamond, I really do I think that you should give me one Then you can prove your love is true And that the gift giving has just begun I want that diamond, I want that thing A tennis bracelet, a ring It better shine, it better cut I know it is expensive but... What other way can you make four months of your measly salary last a lifetime And what other thing have I ever asked you for Besides... The ability to read my mind And I didn't get that either, Yet I want that diamond, I want it so All of my irritating friends will know That I have worth, not only that But that you love me even though I'm fat I want that thing, I want it now I'll say it once, I don't care how you get it You can rob a store, There just is nothing I want more Than diamond jewelry for me And I'll talk louder so you see how very much it means to me! Even some little stud earrings Give me the goddamned diamond!