One, two, three-
God rest ye merry gentlemen
Let nothing you dismay
Remember Christ our savoir
Was born on Christmas day
To save us all from Satan's power
When we were gone astray
Oh, tidings of comfort of joy
Comfort and joy
Oh
Good elves, good girl, good day
Gold chain, gold paint, gold sleigh
Throwin' out the candy corn 'cause Halloween is over
Year went by so fast I thought the world was chillin' in October
Couldn't make the cookies 'cause the oven set on fire
Imma rookie but I'm better than a dumb Santa denier
Took me couple years but now I understand that
Neither of my parents
Were the ones that bought me red and green attire
Saint Nick
Makin' me a bit depressive
With his presents
Why'd he give me coal inside my stocking
It's the same tricks
I know I'm a bit excessive
It's impressive
How much Santa decided not to grant me a great gift
A great gift under the tree tonight
Santa eating cookies when the poor can't even eat tonight
Santa eating cookies when the poor can't even sleep tonight
I think I should be polite but Santa you ain't being right
Christmas isn't even about you
It's kinda messed up
That you just steal the spotlight from Jesus like that
God rest ye merry gentlemen
Let nothing you dismay
Remember Christ our savoir
Was born on Christmas day
To save us all from Satan's power
When we were gone astray
Oh, tidings of comfort of joy
Comfort and joy
Oh
Santa Claus, I'm not giving you cookies
I won't follow all your Canon laws
And imma have to slap my damaged hand across
I'm not about to call myself a communist
But the way that you do not pay your elves
Is very ominous
I heard you gave them places to stay
I'm not a bright teenager
But in my opinion that sounds just like Chinese labor
You say you're watching every kid
Here's something that I've yet seen
What's the reason that you did just nothing about Epstein
Oh, I went there
Let's just speak bluntly
What's the reason you don't get to third world countries
What's the reason you don't get to all the urban areas
Are you just being racist
'Cause I know the kids are scared of ya
I don't care if this dismisses wishes on my wish list
I don't care if Santa listens to this lookin' vicious
Imma wrap this song up like a present
It's a big twist
Despite everything I said I'm wishing Merry Christmas
Um, there's no way that this song ends up
Releasing before Christmas, though, so
I guess I hope you had a good one
I guess you could always listen to it next year I don't-