Through the winter with no end In my boredom dreamt of you Wondered what I had to do Pondered what it would be like to Through some love for you, my friend In my lonesome dreamt of you Wondered if you could really love me The way you always say you do I am burning at the edges Turning into men I've loved before And in the meantime settled in some younger doublescore I sat in the peonies Crying off all my colors And watching the adults move I was asking very nicely In a quiet, pathetic manner To be forgiven, to be forgiven, to be forgiven So and when we were driving home And the lake was just about to close I took your hand, feeling damned I felt your empty arms and that should be good enough Parking down the street By the angel's house All the trees are taller than me They're showing girthings I'm too dumb to see Walking through the field past the angel's house The ground caves beneath my feet I'm looking for something that I'm too dumb to see Oh, the winter I was 19, I let you be my sole fantasy Swimming in the lake, I can't see, I can't see, I can't see