I take a long hard drag of my cigarette I stand too close to the microwave oven There are some feelings in this organ That I am not equipped to govern We go up until we reach the stratosphere We dive down into the Mariana Trench But instead of putting me in the game You wanna hang me out to dry on the bench I'm thinking to retire I'm thinking to retire I had a mentor like a centaur Too much horseplay to get the job done I didn't know what I'd signed up for I thought they'd let me have a badge and a gun My mother didn't raise a bureaucrat, A diplomat, or a state statistician I have ways of going about things Seen as illogical and inefficient They want me to retire They want me to retire I haven't thought too much about family Ain't got no husband or a couple of kids I've spent 26 years in this office I said goodbye to my relationships A long time ago A long time ago What does the mayor of a small town heart do? After she retires?