Old man Cyril had a terrible job He used to pick up all the chewing gum And try to turn it all into tables He never did this though All he ever managed was to make his sticky hands unable And though he tried his best He never had a chuddy picker-upper as quite as good as this fable And now we need him now Or else we're gonna have to travel everywhere by overhead cable Now new machines have made Cyril defunct And he sits in the park trying to sell his shoes to passing strangers He never did this though All he ever managed was to keep a nice clean pair of trainers He made a friend one day Another funny man who did another funny job in the daytime But then he left one night And now he looks around for him and will do 'til the day he dies Oh (ah-ah) Oh (ah) Oh (ah-ah) Oh (ah) Old man Oh, what a terrible job you are doing Old man Oh, what a terrible job you are doing