What will it take to make you happy What will it take to stop your whining What will it take to make you amscray What will it take to stop your crying I know that you've been so bored since the Circle K closed down So if it makes you feel a bit better just picture me Crying crying in my beer I got a feeling you've been damaged I think you've got way too much time on your hands I throw away your stupid little letter Like Margie Whipple you don't get it If you were a TV show baby you would've been cancelled Do to declining viewership recycled plots and bad acting Crying in my beer It's pointless to wonder what life would be like with you and me Cause me minus you equals one less little parasite less I'm crying in my beer