Young dicks make TV Get 'em away from me Young dicks make TV Loads of hair-style ideals Here's the other end of the tale Here's the other end of the scale Law expert makes studio He had waited so long Patrick Moore got a manifesto He learned the words Vid king and spontaneous He learned the words Analysis and through video Solicitor in studio If he got it right Could be a celebrity Like M. Pike Scientists and their bloody childish reading habits Scientists and their bloody childish reading habits But solicitor in studio Soon ran into trouble >From the start, trouble with mike Noises and high pitched wines Aggressive interviewer much too fast Then up came Beaumont Dark Ripped his argument to shreds Solicitor in studio Who ran into trouble He inadvertently proved the point That his profession was rot Shh Shh Shh Solicitor in studio Who soon ran into trouble