Cold tears fall from his eyes As he turns into the night and walks away Lucille runs outside Just to see if there might be a sleigh Little Bobby stares down At the plate where cookies still lay And tries to understand Why Momma said Santa can't stay Momma said Santa can't stay Said she told him that twice yesterday Then a car just like Dad's Pulled out and drove away After mom said Santa couldn't stay Santa can't stay They both heard him coming Saw Mom run down the hall and holler away "Doug you're drunk, don't come inside I'm not joking, I've had all this I can take" He threw a present really hard That almost hit Mom's new boyfriend Ray And yelled ho-ho lucky for you she's here And said that Santa can't stay Momma said Santa can't stay Said she told him that twice yesterday Then a car just like Dad's Pulled out and drove away After mom said Santa couldn't stay Momma said Santa can't stay Said she warned him 'bout it twice yesterday Then a car just like Dad's Pulled out and drove away After mom said Santa couldn't stay Momma said Santa can't stay Said he might just have to beat the crap outta Ray Then a car just like Dad's Peeled out and drove away After mom yelled Santa couldn't stay Momma said Santa can't stay