He walked into the squadron in the summer of '02
And since that time we've never been the same
This wingman who would soon become a legend in his time
He never spoke so no one knew his name
But after his arrival there was never an empty keg
And always a fresh new batch of corn
And the coffee was the best that your lips would ever taste
And the shitter was always filled with porn
And he rode into battle with his back against the sun
And he saved us all for we knew he was the one
And his name was Shaved Dog's Ass
The greatest of wingmen was he
He only said, "2", "lead you're on fire"
And "save the fat one for me"
We soon went off to war and the fighting was intense
The enemy snuck up from the hills
He always got the tally first but never did he shoot
Just sat back as flight leads got the kills
He never would complain when lead would fuck him over
The thought never even crossed his mind
Sixty-nine times they notched press at night, lights
Out, no moon
Shaved Dog's Ass, not once he did go blind
And he rode into battle with his back against the sun
And he saved us all for we knew he was the one
And his name was Shaved Dog's Ass
The greatest of wingmen was he
He only said, "2", "lead you're on fire"
And "save the fat one for me"
With victory secured we set out on the town
To celebrate this war's final end
And we came upon some ladies who were looking for heroes
But only if we had one for their friend
She stood six feet four, three hundred pounds - more
Facial hair than me
You could say she was a football coach's dream
And we all jumped back in horror as we started to abort
Shaved Dog's Ass stood up and took one for the team
And he rode into battle with his back against the sun
And he saved us all for we knew he was the one
That was the last we ever saw of the world's greatest
Wingman
I'd like to think he's watching us from above
Or maybe he's just sitting on some tropical island
He and Sasquatch happily in love
And I think about him often as I'm eating shitty corn
And the coffee is burnt to the glass
So to all you wingman out there who are looking to be
The best
Just heed the lesson of the legend of Shaved Dog's Ass
And he rode into battle with his back against the sun
And he saved us all for we knew he was the one
And his name was Shaved Dog's Ass
The greatest of wingmen was he
He only said, "2", "lead you're on fire"
And "save the fat one for me"