You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch You really are a heel You're as cuddly as a cactus You're slippery as an eel, Mr. Grinch You're a bad banana with a greasy black peel You're a monster, Mr. Grinch Your heart's an empty hole Your brain is full of spiders You've got garlic in your soul, Mr. Grinch I wouldn't touch you With a thirty nine and a half foot pole You're a vile one, Mr. Grinch You have termites in your smile You have all the tender sweetness Of a seasick crocodile, Mr. Grinch Given the choice between the two of you I'd take the seasick crocodile Take it Mr. Grinch You're a rotter, Mr. Grinch You're the king of sinful sots Your heart's a dead tomato splotched With moldy purple spots, Mr. Grinch Your soul is an appalling dump heap Overflowing with the most disgraceful Assortment of deplorable rubbish imaginable Mangled up in tangled up knots Mr. Grinch