They put you down and call you crazy Say "You're disgusting and uncool!" Just because you like to touch yourself Out by the public swimming pool You've gotta fight for your right to masturbate! You've gotta fight for your right to masturbate! You used to do it in the park But the powers that be didn't like it THey called you "pervert" and "criminal" Now you have to use a blanket You've gotta fight for your right to masturbate! You've gotta fight for your right to masturbate! You've got to fight! Pass the acorn butter! 7-11 two for a dollar! They say that you'll go blind And your ruining your health But how can anybody love anyone in this crazy world If you can't love yourself? You've gotta fight for your right to masturbate! You've gotta fight for your right to masturbate! You've gotta fight for your right to masturbate! You've gotta fight for your right to masturbate! You've gotta fight! Awww...