I know girls like you Need someone to screw-up their life And make you contemplate suicide, When you need a friend to Blah-blah-blah-blah-blah Call on me... yeah You need someone bad, To irritate your dad, Someone who'll make you cry, And sock you in the eye, When you need a friend to Bring you to your knees, Call on me... yeah Am I crazy enough? Am I angry enough? Am I stupid enough? Am I lazy enough? Am I drunk enough? Do I flunk enough? Am I jealous enough? Am I selfish enough to be... Your bridge under troubled water, yeah! You like pain, you're insane You can key my car, And punch my face in the bar When you blah-blah-blah-blah-blah-blah-blah-blah-blah Call me... oh yeah Am I crazy enough? Am I angry enough? Am I stupid enough? Am I lazy enough? Am I drunk enough? Do I flunk enough? Am I jealous enough? Am I selfish enough to be... Your bridge under troubled water, yeah! Am I boring enough? Am I snoring enough? Am I demanding enough? Un-outstanding enough? Am I fat enough? Mad enough? Am I bad enough? Wear plaid enough? Am I drunk enough? Smell like a skunk enough? Do I wank enough? Do crank enough to be... Your bridge under trouble Your bridge under trouble Your bridge under troubled water!